Just when we think we've turned the corner with Nia, she goes and pitches a royal knock-down, drag-out fit. The hardest part for us is to keep calm, remain emotional disengaged, and not let her drag us into it. You have to understand, these fits are loud and violent complete with kicking, thrashing about, and screaming.
Last night she even went as far as to tell each of us that she doesn't like us and doesn't even care about us at all. So now we've added verbal abuse to her arsenal. Even though I'm 38 years old, those words brought out my Mama Bear. I just can't have a member of our family telling my little ones that they are not liked or cared for. They don't understand that she is trying to hurt with her words. They simply believe her and find themselves utterly wounded. We told her that we still care about her, and even if she really doesn't like us to please not tell us again.
Another difficulty is to see Nia do all of this and not scream at her something along the lines of "After All We've Done For You!" I can't expect her to be grateful. I can never make her feel like she owes us anything. She was powerless in coming to our family. She doesn't owe us anything except respect because we are her parents. I know this, but I still long to see some small speck of gratitude, gratefulness, thanks, appreciation. But we get nothing. Again, God lets me feel a little like He must feel sometimes. Ugh.